Homer, Iowa, March 10, 1861

Dear James,

When I wrote last I intended to write again in a few days but the same procrastinating spirit which led me to put off writing on the subject of your marriage for months previous to its success has kept me from attending to it till now. The reluctance for I felt it as such has not arisen from indifference but from the importance of the step you were about to take and now have taken. Having no knowledge of Lizzy, I did not feel at liberty to risk any advice on the premises (?). But now that your election is made "and that is all over" -- that serious views of life must if ever ? be entertained and knowing no reason why Lizzy should not be numbered among the objects of immediate affection and welcomed to our humble domestic circle this reluctant restraint has passed away.

My dear children, I trust you will constantly ?pray? to the Lord to direct your every step in life. So shall the true ends of marriage be attained. Happiness in this life ?prepares? for Heaven, and a spiritual union which is to be eternal.

There are three great epochs in human life. Birth, marriage, and death! The first commences or introduces a state of endless being. The 2nd more than ?tinges?, it determines to a great degree the quality of the man, while the 3rd ushers in the final state of happiness or not which life has fitted us for enjoying. Every particular of the Divine providence is to fit us for and draw us to heaven, and as the kingdom of God must be formed within us before it can be enjoyed, and [as] this can be done only in the exercise of our reason, and liberty, we may invert or pervert the whole, and be unhappy! Marriage itself, the great institution for humanizing and drawing us our of the love or ourselves into the love of others, and into the supreme love of God and as a consequence into the enjoyment of heavenly happiness, may be turned into the procuring cause of the greatest misery here and hereafter. We are born sensual, this is we are influenced by the senses only. By the acquirement of knowledge we rise to the natural state into which the Brute is born, but if we stop, a knowledge of natural things and desire to possess them, we halt in the middle of the course intended for us, and in no ways surpass the "beasts that perish" except in duration. Now as we become ration in natural things by acquiring a knowledge of them, and of their uses, do we become ration in heavenly things by acquiring a knowledge of spiritual things, when we apply this knowledge to the regulation [of our] conduct, which will lead us to clearer views of our spiritual constitution and wants and make us truly wise. The wisdom thus acquired is not "fossilized" but eternally progressive.

I intended to write you a series of letters with reference to marriage and its instrumentality in opening in our minds all of the fountains of heavenly ?beatitudes? not in this life only but more fully in the next. Indeed in this life, internal and surrounding evils have such power that the scene at best is checkered with disappointment, trials, sufferings of varied form! These sorrows or chastisements are necessary to drag into light closely inhering evils which otherwise could not be seen, much less be acknowledged and put away as sins against God! But instead of these letters, I have concluded my purpose will be better attained by sending you a book which is mailed with this letter. I hope you will both study it carefully, and may the Lord bless you with that wisdom which can be obtained from him alone who is the Light and Life of the world.

We are looking now with anxiety for the president's inaugural to see whether he breathes peace or war and strange to tell, many are anxious for the latter. I hope he will see it is now too late -- that cession belongs to the past, for which he is not responsible, but I feat that madness will rule the hour! --

We have a great amount of snow. As much as in ?5-6-7?, but not so cold as that [was?] the cold enough. Was glad to see the statement of the temperature in Mobile for several years. Changes in warm climates seem harder to bear than in cold. Forest trees are not killed or split by 30 to 40 degrees below zero, nor are hens frozen on the nest in anything deserving the name of a hen house in this latitude much as the winds often aid in removing the animal heat.

The spring opens promising more so than it was thought it would. The snow drifts were so deep.

As to the matter nearest my own heart as well as that of all, I am at a loss to know what to say. I refer to your coming home. There is land for you to operate on, and there is no doubt about making a successful living and more too if it is desired, not would the attention be greater than is necessary in any other business while the irksome and ? confinement is wholly dispensed with. Nor need the land be hard if rightly managed. What there is in the ? there is industry wanted which is wanted in any other employment. There is some capital or patience ? economy in its stead and last but not the least by far, there is union of effort wanted. Farming requires the attention of several who will take the right kind of interest -- divide the labor of care and at times manage different parts of the operation. I need this spring someone fit to go to market with stock (as I must sell and pay off) while these should ? those left in charge of house operations who have more experience and push than can be expected of boys.

I have concluded not to send the book Conjugal Love till I hear from you again as I doubt somewhat the postal arrangements in the present state of affairs.

We think times begin to look more encouraging here, not that money is much plentier. But people are far better and those who will pay are getting out of debt, and we are getting to it. The rapidly increasing population of the northwest must soon ... land here. In this view of the subject, I would like to see you here. If you did not like it, we could tell in a short time and have the means of ... elsewhere.

Your affectionate father

J.H. Williams

Memoirs and Decency

In the preface to Education of a General, a biography of General George Marshall, the author, Forrest Pogue, explains that Marshall would not write his own memoirs.

His refusal to write his memoirs threatened to leave a serious gap in our knowledge of one of the great leaders of World War II. Pressed repeatedly during the war by friends to keep some record, he declined, saying that a diarist ran the risk of doing only those things which would look good in the journal or of putting down only those actions which would make him look good. A journal which he kept in World War I was later destroyed on the grounds that he may have been unfair to some of the men discussed therein.

Despite pressure from publishers and friends to write his autobiography, he refused to listen to lavish offers of money and declined all inducements to write articles or sketches or to use the services of a ghost writer. Only when the George C. Marshall Research Foundation was organized did he finally agree to cooperate with a trained historian in a series of interviews. Even here, he drew back from pronouncing harsh judgments on his contemporaries, constantly reminding his biographers the he didn't want readers turning through the book to see who had been insulted on page nine.

What are the chances of someone in government today having the same, high moral standard? People like Alan Greenspan can't wait for their $8 million advance to say how stupid the people were with whom they worked.

Great Generals

As the war in Iraq goes from bad to worse, we miss the great generals of the past. One of the greatest of the 20th century, probably the greatest, was General George Marshall, whom Winston Churchill described as the "organizer of victory." While Marshall did not command troops in the field during World War II, he was the general in charge of the entire war. He commanded the generals.

A biography of General Marshall by Forrest Pogue begins with a foreword by General of the Army Omar Bradley. General Bradley says that during the interviews for this biography, "Fresh in [General Marshall's] mind after fifty years were the impressions he gained from visiting the sites of the French and Indian War battles fought within a few miles of his birthplace in Pennsylvania, and the impact made by the examples of Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson."

It's interesting that he cites the Southern generals Lee and Jackson, rather than the victorious Grant and Sherman. Of course, part of the reason is that Marshall attended VMI, but also, Lee and Jackson were men of great moral character, unlike Grant and many of the Yankee generals. The Southerners were no doubt models for the high moral character that Marshall embodied, which stood the United States well during the trying times of World War II.

Would that we had a general of similar character to lead us in Iraq today!

What Is a Gentleman?

I have gotten tired of the current use of the word "gentleman" by the media, and probably by everyone else. It should mean a man who is polite, educated, and thoughtful of others. In current usage it is used to describe the most horrible men, as in, "The accused child molester was caught yesterday; the gentleman will appear in court today."

In many cases, it is used just because it is a longer word than "man," and gives the announcer a few extra microseconds to think about what he or she will say next. In other cases it is used because it tends to give some positive spin to the character of the person they are talking about, and thus they are less likely to be sued for libel, as if they forget to throw in "accused" or "alleged" in describing the accusations against someone who has not yet been convicted.

In other cases, it's probably just because "gentleman" doesn't mean anything in today's society, because there are so few, and the traits of a gentleman are more likely to be ridiculed than praised. Jane Austen would be sad. Mr. Darby today would be a greedy, pushy, impolite hedge fund trader, rather than someone just not at ease with ordinary people.

In Gone with the Wind Rhett Butler, the archetype of today's man, was quick to say that he was no gentleman. And Ashley Wilkes would probably just sigh and regret the passing of yet another Southern virtue that is gone with the wind.

Great-Grandfather Noted in Mobile Publication

The Magnolia Messenger, published by the trustees of Magnolia Cemetery in Mobile, Alabama, featured a picture of the "Can't Get Away Club" on the first page of its last issue. One member of the club was my great-grandfather James M. Williams, who was in the picture in the article. He was a colonel in the Confederate Army, in the 21st Alabama, which he probably considered the most notable event in his life. The "Can't Get Away Club" was a group in Mobile that promised not to leave town during yellow fever epidemics, but to stay in town and care for the sick. Letters to and from Col. Williams and his relatives and friends have been posted on this blog. Col. Williams is buried in Magnolia Cemetery.

Miller's Ferry, Alabama, Hit by Tornado As Enterprise Was

These pictures show the destruction at Miller's Ferry in Wilcox County, Alabama. A lot of my family came from Camden, Kimbrough, Lower Peach Tree, and other little towns in Wilcox County. When my dad worked at the Corps of Engineers, I think he worked on the dam at Miller's Ferry. I don't think I have any relatives left there anymore, except maybe a 4th cousin twice removed or something like that. In any case, Miller's Ferry is literally gone with the wind.

I was thinking about Camden lately when Hillary and Obama went down to Selma to campaign. To the extent that any of my relatives were involved, I imagine they were on what is now the wrong side (or at least sympathized with the wrong side) of the confrontation they were commemorating last weekend.

Mobile on TV

The GMAC Bowl was played in Mobile, but there were almost no pictures of the city, just a few of the battleship Alabama in Mobile Bay. It was disappointing not to see more.